Tuesday, January 30, 2007

The Boy Done Wrong Again

Dear Sienna,
We've all had our ups and downs with you. Mostly downs. Back in the boho era, you were queen of prarie skirts and gilets, and you rocked them out, even though sometimes you looked like a Romanian gypsy, and eventually it became really played out. Then you started to think that you actually were Edie Sedgwick, instead of just playing her in a poorly directed movie featuring terrible acting and costume design. For a brief moment it was cool, but you went a little overboard with it, wearing ugly clothes, becoming too much of a trend whore, and frankly, a little creepy. Recently, you've seemed to clean up a little, going medieval-chic in Marchesa for the Golden Globes, or sporting simple, breezy dresses. No matter what, you've almost always had interesting outfits, and quite the style evolution, and aside from the fact that you're only famous in the USA for fucking Jude Law and having some semblance of a sense of style, I (sort of) respect you for that.
Alas, what I'm about to show you is unacceptable. Not only are you wearing a fur shirt, and not only are you wearing no pants, and instead just extremely strange briefs, and not only are your shoes completely passé, but most importantly, this is a regression. Yes, I realize that you were at a party for the Factory Girl movie, but isn't this all a little last year? I honestly thought that you had moved on, to greener pastures. The tights, the fuzzy shirt, the ankle boots, the no-pants look...it's just so bizarre. Also, your jacket is fur-lined, and it's extremely tasteless to wear more than one fur piece in most situations, particularly when you're in Los Angeles. Really, what made you think that this looked good?
Image and video hosting by TinyPic (picture from Faded Youth)
Please seek counseling with Emmanuelle Alt.
Love, Eliza

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

You're very good at satirical writing.
I'm impressed.

E said...

Why thank you.

Bojana said...

Oh how I love you

DDL said...

Too True.

Put some pants on woman!

Bojana said...

Actually it's not that the hotpants thing is bad, it's just that only one persone in the world can pull off those spandex micro hotpants whilst wearing electric blue tights and we all know who that person is. Other people shouldn't even try to pull off this look.

E said...

True true. But Lia doesn't wear strange high-waisted briefs, she wears real hot pants. Oh how we love her.